The words that people say to us can have a lasting effect, leaving us feeling powerless and vulnerable.
Over time, the things that people say to us can shape our own opinion of ourselves. This can lead to a fear of being judged, which if we are not careful, can negatively impact our relationships, jobs, social situations, and self-esteem.
Try these techniques to overcome this fear and get your self-esteem back on track:
1. Learn your strengths and limitations. Once you know your own strengths and limitations, you’ll be less likely to be affected by what others say. Their opinions on your abilities become irrelevant, since you know what you are capable of.
● Have confidence in your own ability but be aware of what you cannot do.
2. Acknowledge that things do not need to be perfect. Human perfection is a myth. You can excel at your tasks without them being perfect.
● Rather than focusing on any imperfections, know that you are doing the best that you can – and that your best is good enough.
3. Understand that people will always have an opinion. Some opinions will please you and others won’t. What matters most, though, is your own opinion.
4. Be aware of your inner critic. That little voice in your own head can become deafening at times, so it’s important to recognize when negative thoughts start to creep in.
● Once you start to recognize what triggers these negative thoughts, you can take the necessary steps to change them into positive ones.
5. Make yourself a priority. When you allow someone else’s judgement to cloud your own perceptions, you actually give that person power and priority over your life. You can take back control of your life by recognizing that you are your priority, not them.
6. Invest in yourself. Enhance your personal growth and well-being by doing more of what you enjoy doing. Take time for self-care.
● The better you treat yourself, the better others will treat you as well, thus lessening your fear of their judgement.
7. Know that your memories fade. Even though hearing someone criticize you hurts at the time, if you purposely put it to the back of your mind by thinking of something else, then the memory of this event will fade.
● There is only so much room in your memory banks, so you want to ensure that you aren’t giving these negative thoughts priority over more positive thoughts.
8. Tell yourself that you are good enough. Looking squarely at yourself in a mirror and telling yourself that you are good enough can help. Practice this exercise several times each day – whenever you’re in front of a mirror.
● Repeat the affirmation that you are good enough off and on throughout the day, especially when you feel doubt creeping in.
● Soon, you will automatically think about how you are good enough every time you see yourself. Your self-talk will automatically start to gravitate to the positive.
● Consistent, positive reassurance such as this can help overcome the fear of failure and being judged.
Before you let fear of judgement affect your life in a negative manner, try these tips. You’ll be glad you did!
